My Childhood Abuse and its Legacy
As I reflect on my life I cannot help wondering what my life would have been without the love, guidance, and protection of the Lord. I am often perplexed by the endurance abilities that are embedded in the mind, heart, and body of individuals who are living with the legacy of childhood abuse. When I speak of legacy I am not talking about family inheritance of gifts or money, I am talking about the legacies that are gain because of abuse, from verbal to sexual.
When I am asked, how I would describe myself? I often replied resilient without having to ponder the question, I truly believed that my resilience is one of the positive legacies that I had developed to help me cope with the negative legacies that result from my childhood abuse, these negative legacies include isolation, self-doubt, feeling of worthlessness, and feeling unwanted within my family and the society. One of the reasons that many survivors of childhood abuse keep going every day despite the negative feelings that we are facing each and every day is due to our resilience’s refusing to give up.
I think it is hard to explain the kind of legacies that are woven into every little part of a survivor’s existences because every survivor has different ways of coping with their legacies. I have struggled with my negative legacies all my life, there have been times that I felt crippled by the weight of my psychological pain, but somehow manage to hold on to the promises of God. The book of James 1:12 read “blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him.” These promises strengthen my survival abilities by giving me tools to help me in building positive legacies, which I now use to shape and guide my everyday life.